Rambling about Love, Life, and Happiness. LifeStyle.

In the quest to find the love of my life, I mainly use social media sites, which is probably my down fall. That being said, why in God's name is it so hard? Well, first, I'm a big guy, so therefore it's 10 times harder anyway. Is that really a bad thing? Don't you girls know we love the most, and will make you laugh the most. It means more to a guy like me than, say, a guy who won the genetic lottery. We're usually, more intelligent, more loving, and more commitment.

That being said, I will say that personally I have had great relationships, after a long search, but nothing that really stuck or appeared to go anywhere. Regrettably, most ended because I couldn't handle the person, because it appears I can't get a normal girl. I will also admit I, kinda, let the love of my life slip through my fingers. I miss her more than I want to live even now, but regrettably, again, she's gone. I contacted her a few months ago and I messed her up she said and she wants nothing to do with me. I have to say I did, and I should be punished for it, but than I did beg her for forgiveness. I suppose, you can't forgive people for certain things in life, I understand that. I will always wish her atll the happiness in the world, she deserves it more than anyone I've ever met. I may always love her, until, of course I find someone to give all my love to. Which isn't looking great, honestly. I mean, she had me losing weight, fulfilling my dreams, and she just gave me the greatest love I could ever ask for. I love you Rosetta. May you find this one day.

Okay, enough with my sob story, I just wanted to shout that out. All this being said, I believe in love that, if you're with a girl, all your love should always go to them. It confuses me when people say, “Oh I'll always love so and so,” when they're married to so and so. It kinda makes me sick, honestly, unless the lover has died in a terrible way. That is forever understandable. Death is the darkest, scariest thing in this word, thus far. I mean, yes living forever and being uncomfortable would be worse. As we are not a society that has the ability to live longer, Death is the darkest thing I can think of. People say, Oh well I'm going to heaven when I die to live in paradise. Well, even that scares me, I don't know this God person, do you? You've met him and he said, “Oh, yea when you die I promise you everything.” sounds like an empty promise, but I'm open to the idea. I mean, I wish God, or Gods and Goddess or something would just have a conversation with me for like five or so minutes. That's all I'm asking....I'll get back to you on that as they didn't just appear and tell me.

Love, that's the ultimate gift in life that we can ever have, even the richest man will tell you that. Especially love that has nothing to do with your status, or net worth. If I were a rich person, how could I tell if a girl actually love me, yes I could have a girl to love, and have fun, but would it be the same? I think not, but than I suppose there are people who would. I mean they'd respect you and think you're absolutely everything they've ever wanted. Kinda how girls are attracted to teachers, no matter how they look and so on. For the same reason I was attracted to both my English teachers, plus english teachers are really interesting people I think.

Anyway, girls today are as bad as men now. Where girls used to be shy, bashful, etc. Now they're like all open about everything, I mean they really don't care. I men are just as bad, but you girls should know the good from the bad, and some of you do, but still. I mean, if a guy is being mean to you, and you keep going back to him, you're absolutely mental. You need to let this guy go, and be on your way. I suppose girls have always been as bad, there's just so many people populating the earth, that it's hard to phase through the good and bad of them.

That being said, girls are amazing. You guys really are, you can literally see through the bad, to see only the good, and it really just amazes me. I remember courting a girl, endless love letters, poems, and just showing her how much I cared; to finally she said yes. She really loved me, nothing about me could ever change that, and that really showed me why girls can love a bad man. I wish I could love like that, but than I suppose we can. Contrary to popular belief, men have very sensitive hearts. I know I do, I wear my heart on my sleeves, and when I love you I always will. No matter what, until you tire of me, of course. Than I may think of you, because every love is something out of this world. We love like no other things in the universe that we know of so far, I think we love more than even Gods, we really take it to another level. Being in love is a treasure, so don't abuse it. Don't just through it around like it's just something you can do. Though, I must admit I say I love everyone, but it's a family type of love. There's so many types of love as well. It's very complicated subject that needs to be review and revised more I think.

I hope you enjoyed this, not sure if you learned anything, but if you did that's great. May you find all the happiness in the world.

Puff.

Love ya.